Two days in a row!! Don’t fall over.

I know I said the blog was going to be quiet because I am working on this book project but that was before the rest of the day.

My friend asked me to hold her accountable to a plan she has for Lent.

I’ve been thinking about Lent and wondering what to do with it.

I am not fond of failure and I tend to be bad at doing anything for more than a few days at a time.

Committing to this book thing has been a HUGE stretch. We are six days in and so far, so good!

Back to my friend.

I warned her that I’m not a mushy accountability person, I will nag her!

She said she would do the same for me.

Over the last few years this whole Lent business has really had me over a barrel. You see I don’t want to give up something that isn’t really a sacrifice. Giving up chocolate or chips may feel like a sacrifice but is it really? I don’t need those things in the first place. The purpose of Lent is to create space for the Lord to come in and move in your life. Moving chocolate and chips to the side is good, but it didn’t feel like that was the thing for me. I want my ‘thing’ to be something that God is asking to hand over.

Then I read a facebook post that my cousin wrote and it really resonated.  It said this;

Lent is not so much about giving something up as it is about giving something over.

Now that seemed to make more sense to me but I still wasn’t sure what it was that God was requiring of me. I pursued it until something started burning in my heart.

I have this desire to enjoy His presence. I want to feel my love for my God. This is what I felt like He wants from me; simply to run after Him for the next 40 days, to pursue active loving of my God.

So this morning I asked Him how He wanted me to love Him today and that is what I am going to do every day for the next 40 days. I don’t really know what it will look like, but this is my giving over. I tend to cocoon my heart and build protective walls. For the next 40 days those walls are down…I want to share this journey here for some reason…maybe more accountability or maybe because He wants you to watch me fall deeper in love with Him. I’m not sure.

Day 1 was on Wednesday

I was at Bible study and we listened to Beth Moore teaching on the love of God and the video wrecked me and the sharing time afterward wrecked me and I am finding myself¬† wanting to feel and love in tangible ways…

Day 2 was today…

There were a few pieces of the love puzzle today…

1. I played restaurant with my kids, I let them use the china and nice glasses. I came when they rang the bell and removed their dishes and served them ‘dessert’. It was such a delight to see the pleasure in their eyes that mama took time to play.

2. I talked to my mama and had an opportunity to gently encourage her hurting heart today.

3. God showed me where He needed me to forgive some old wounds and healing burst through in an old relationship…

4. I spoke my husband’s love language today, because he loves me and I love him….

If you would like to follow this open journal of Lent…make sure to subscribe up there in the box!