I’m beginning to think that I have multiple personalities!
When I am in writing mode I have a hundred ideas for new stories, articles, posts, and books. Each of those ideas reaches out to a different audience. Yet, when I go to writing workshops they always tell me, “Focus on just one, you can’t do all things well”. Then I dither about which one to pick. Which idea has the most impact, the largest audience and so on? Which one do I leave behind, I love all the ideas? I love to write. I am a writer!
When I am in creative mode I have a hundred ideas for new projects, colors, and plans. Each of those ideas has great merit and requires time, energy and resources that I may or may not have. Projects always take longer then you think they will. So which one to pursue? The ones that might sell at a trade show? Speaking of which, do I rent a table – which towns? I love creating. I am a maker!
When I am in ministry mode I have a hundred ideas for how to teach, group initiatives, and plans for activities and new teaching. Each of those ideas would require that I have time and energy and resources to carry out those fabulous plans. But I am not the leader of those ministries and haven’t been given authority or resources to do any of what is in my head, even though I can see that it would be of great benefit to those involved. Is this the path for me? I love ministry. I am a teacher/administrator/exhorter!
Don’t forget that I am a wife and mother with three kids still at home and adult kids who, apparently, still need a mom now and then. I have a home and yard to take care of. We run a farm business that requires thought and input from me. Soon it will be spring and we need to decide if we are going to tend gardens big enough to sell into the organic market. We need to decide about any value-added products that we might want to pursue. We are in the middle of incorporating and it takes incredible energy to get everything switched over. I love my family and farm. I am a business owner, mom, and wife!
I am good at all these things, some say gifted even. I WANT to do all those things. Part of me feels the NEED to do all those things because this is how I’m wired.
The one thing
According to the experts, this blog should have one message that I should continually be writing about. Yet I haven’t quite figured out what that ONE thing is. I am supposed to find my tribe and write to them. But who are YOU??
I talk about crazy grace a lot because I need crazy amounts of grace to live the crazy life that I do.
Who are you?
Maybe that’s my audience – the crazies! The mavericks. The forerunners. The ones who are conflicted about all the things. You are my tribe. You who need all the grace in the world. Crazy amounts of it. You who are having trouble finding the focus, the one thing.
Thankfully we serve a God who has crazy amounts of grace to pour out on us. He is the voice telling me, this is the way walk in it each day, whether I am writer, maker, minister or mother.
Let’s limp along and figure this out together shall we? Perhaps, together, we can fly.
Ps. I’d love to hear from you. What crazy grace do you need today?